New Heights Men at New Heights Church Message from: Alex Hedgepeth Hey Men, I’m sitting here on the day after Labor Day wondering if the day off was worth the hassle that hits afterward. It’s been a rough morning. I take comfort knowing most/all of you have experienced the same kind of thing. Jesus said that in this world you will have trouble. Jesus, the master of understatement. Now, I know  the trouble we experience here is nothing compared to others in our world, such as a father in a third world country despairing about how he is going to feed his family, or families in war torn areas struggling to live out the day. The degree or severity of the trouble doesn’t really matter, what matters is the fact we all are going through things that concern us greatly, bother us, if you will. Things that move our minds off of the larger story and get us thinking about the little small stories that will mire us in a swamp of discouragement. A friend and I were fishing many years ago and he was relating to me how an old friend of his was letting the pressure of being an elementary school principal get to him. He was really worried about his friend and I was thinking, really????  An elementary school in the backwoods of Mississippi and the pressure cooker was on? Two weeks later that principal shot himself to death. If we stay in these small stories too long, they start becoming reality for us and then we are left, usually in small moments of clarity, wondering what happened to the abundant life promised to us in scripture. Why do you think so many people go on vacation and want to move to whatever tourist trap they just visited? It’s not an absence of stress there; they were just able to leave their small stories and stresses behind for a while. It seems like we have to be really stuck before we will talk to someone else and the more stuck we are, the higher up the help chain we go. We struggle through tough times in our marriage without consulting someone else, until one of us has an affair. Then we go see our pastor, or a counselor.  We hate our boss or coworker until our job performance stinks so bad that we are about to be fired, then we talk to someone to get it off our chest or get some advice on how to handle it. What is it about us that make us so reluctant to seek counsel from others? There are many reasons, so just take your pick, just don’t spend too much time trying to figure it out by yourself.   Proverbs tells us that the purposes of a man’s heart are like deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out (20:5). That man could be a friend, relative, co-worker, or, you could go to a counselor. In between the first two paragraphs of this note and the rest, I ran into Ryan Rana, the director of the Joshua Center and a good friend of mine. We actually had a few minutes to talk, and I related the story of my tough morning, and as always, he gave me some great wisdom which lightened the load on my heart tremendously. He then asked me a question about how I had parented my kids (my girls are 19 and 17 his are 9 and below). As I was answering his question, several times he said “really? I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who has experienced that with my kids”. So two men willing to bounce their lives off of each other finding comfort more in each other’s presence, knowledge, experience and compassion. So, men, I urge you, in the problem areas of your life, quit going it alone. Seek counsel. Don’t stop seeking it until you get it. Climb the help ladder until you find a “man of understanding”. Hey, try this one to satisfy your practical joker side. Go to a counselor before your life is in the ditch. Tell him that, no, my wife hasn’t left me, or no, I’m not about to lose my job, I just know that I’m not understanding why I am struggling with _______________ right now and wanted to see if you could shed some light on this. Then sit back and look at his face real close as he is freaked out by not having to get you out of the ditch first. I look forward to hearing about it. Have a great week men Alex